Apparently this might seem a little bit out of topic, but saying no is one of the most important things you have to do to increase your focus. If you say yes to every shiny object, person, activity project, or anything else, you will not have time nor energy, nor focus, to achieve what really is important to you. This is not to say that you should ignore every single person on earth and focus only on yourself. Focusing is not only about being more productive, it's also about creating more meaningful experiences in your life. So when you focus on the right things, you are happier. So please don't say yes to every single project that someone suggests to you.

Because those projects are probably not the ones that will bring you the most joy and happiness before accepting any request or solicitation, think twice, if that's really what you want to be doing, reflect on how it might affect fact your focus and energy to deal with your priorities this thing yes to that project will increase the quality of your life or On the contrary, it will always steal your productivity. Enjoy. I'm not saying you should say no to everything that appears in your life, but try to only commit to those things that you really want to be doing, saying no, he's way more difficult than it seems. And it makes me really uncomfortable to say no. And sometimes I say yes, because I can't really know how to say no, even though I don't want to say yes, I do it. Thankfully, I'm becoming a little bit better when saying no.

And I've learned a few techniques with the behavioral investigator Vanessa Edwards. And so I'll be covering some of her tips. So in your head, your main answer should always be no. And only then you can think about it and see exactly if you really want to be doing those things or not. So if someone invites you for a meeting Or a party, you can say, I will see my schedule and I will get back to you with an answer. By doing this, you don't have to say no, right in that moment to that person, you can just, you know, go home, think a little bit about it, and then say yes or no, depending on the things you really want to do.

The second tip is, don't excuse yourself, when you say no to someone, don't explain why you can't make it. If you do explain the reasons why you will not go. People will argue with you, and they will give you other suggestions of how you can actually make it. So let's say you don't want to go to that party that night. And you say, Well, I can't really go because I have to wake up early next morning. Don't be surprised if the person offers to take you home earlier, or if someone wants to go out with you to meet you.

And you say well, I can't really go because I have to write an essay though. To be surprised if the person says Come on, bring your computer. And we can even work together. Just say I can't make it. And I'm sorry, and don't offer an explanation. And I know this is harder than it seems.

And sometimes I find myself pretty much telling my whole life story to that person to explain why I can't make it or why I really don't want to go, it is still something I really have to work on. But I know I'm a little bit better than I was. What we can do, instead of offering an explanation is offering an alternative that is better for us. If you really don't want to go to the party, invite the person to meet for lunch next week, or invite them to go shopping. And by offering an alternative, you're making sure that the person is not hurt, but don't offer any alternatives. If you really don't want to do anything with that person.

We all have some people who are kind of toxic, and we don't want to be with but sometimes we say yes even don't We don't want to go. So in those cases don't offer any alternative. So I'm with you in this journey of trying to become a little bit better at saying no to all of those requests that we really don't want to be doing.