Creating foundations for solutions

Accusations and Reproaches Creating foundations for solutions
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Transcript

Is the formula our DNS is used to concrete design legations a good starting position for solution searches obtained, the search for a solution receives a solid foundation consisting of needs and states, but it is not a matter of any theoretically possible solution, but of a practical solution that takes into account the needs and states of the partners in Worf. And built on them. In doing so, one must keep in mind the needs in states are not residual recognize, and that they may turn out differently depending on the specific situation. For example, the same accusation of you didn't do laundry again. Considered a completely different need than that for support and a difference state then exhaustion. Let us look at such a possibility accusation plus some initial investments from you nice build a story and dine it Suzanne hates it so this is real image of the philosopher Conan Moses media quotes apostles.

For me So hang the lesson. If the result of a concrete decision, it's not as before I'm exhausted, but I feel left out. Then another solution is needed for the situation. Then it is not enough for example, to hire a cleaner or take the laundry to laundry. Then you have to take care of the person. One of the big mistakes In partnerships, but also in friendships or other relationships is to look for solution to quickly or to propose a solution to quickly.

This says seems necessary to get rid of an acquisition greatly. But that does not work. Solutions however, must start exactly at the respective not. An opening such unit consists of free cognizing the state of the person concerned with a bit can be taken into account. So if someone approaches you with you never take care of all holiday planning, you all if anything to me, it could be rushed to run to the nearest travel agency, plan a holiday and then announce beaming, I've taken care of everything. You don't need to do anything more.

Perhaps the partner will say, but there was not what I wanted. Just wanted to talk to you about my feelings. Such a colossal mistake in a couple would be for example, she accuses him, you never think of me. Then he runs off and buys her present, but refuses to take it. I don't want a gift. I want you to listen to my sorrows.

To bet one could say that the solution has missed the problem. Basically, that applies to all partnership situations. A solution needs a solid foundation. And that consists always in the emotional world of the partners for example, wanting to feel secure, confirmed etc. Although accusation usually represent an attempt to lay this foundation, they often achieve the opposite because they hide needs. They have to text because the conceal dependency for humans because they present injury communication and a headless attempt of communication.

The appropriate solution is found when the need emerges behind the accusation. And the communication does become direct and openly at the latest when accusations become violent or secure, and just time to use them to strengthen the relationship, or at least to clarify the state of affairs. As far as the findings on how to deal with accusations, we now come to the practical part. That means to the question of how those affected can use accusations in a good way. In the forum, I will explain and demonstrate to exercise one exercise for those who make accusation And another for those who are hit by acquisitions.

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