Module four gaining control. Anger is instinctual. Yes, it is any emotion that comes unbidden and we often don't have a choice whether we would be angry or not. But we can do however, is take control of our anger when it comes. In this module we will discuss ways to gain control over our anger. Specifically, we will discuss recognizing warning signs, coping thoughts, relaxation techniques and ways to blow off steam.
A word of warning. The first step in gaining control of anger is to recognize its warning signs. You have to be aware of symptoms that your anger is about to build up so that you can catch yourself early and make the necessary intervention. This process involves taking yourself from the moment and observing your own reactions from a third person point of view. Warning Signs of anger exist in a range Some are very obvious, others very subtle. They differ from person to person.
Signs of anger can be physical, mental, emotional, and behavioral. physical signs of anger include rapid heart rate, difficulty breathing, headache, stomachache, sweating, feeling hot in the face and neck shaking. Mental signs of anger include difficulty concentrating, obsessing on the situation, thinking vengeful thoughts, cynicism. Emotional signs of anger include sadness, irritability, guilt, resentment, feeling like you need to hurt someone needing to be alone, needing to isolate oneself, numbness. Behavioral signs of anger include clenching fists, pounding a fist on a wall or table or any surface pacing, raising one's voice, any act of aggression, passive aggression using coping thoughts, once you realize that you were angry or that you're about to get angry, you can start calming yourself mentally. The following are just a few mental scripts you can use to keep your anger under control.
Number one, come down first and think this through. Number two, this may not be as bad as it seems. Number three, this is just one incident it doesn't define my life. Number four, I'm capable of managing this situation. Number five, it's alright to be upset. I have the right to be upset in this situation, I am angry.
Number six, what needs to be done immediately? damage control solution focus mode. Number seven bad things mistakes do happen. Nothing says that things will go right all the time. Number eight, there is no need to feel threatened here. Number nine, I have no control over other people and their feelings but I have control over myself.
Number 10. I have managed anger successfully before and I will again using relaxation techniques. Another way to help you control your anger is to intentionally induce yourself to a state of calm This can help Especially in addressing the physical symptoms of anger, relaxation techniques that you can do include number one breathing exercises. Deliberately controlling your breathing can help a person calm down. ways to do this include breathing through one's nose and exhaling through one's mouth, breathing from one's diaphragm and breathing rhythmically. Number two meditation.
Meditation is a way of exercising mental discipline. Most meditation techniques involve increasing self awareness, monitoring thoughts and focusing. meditation techniques include prayer, the repetition of a mantra and relaxing movement or postures. Number three progressive muscle relaxation PMR. EMR is a technique of stress management that involves mentally inducing your muscles to tense and relax. PMR usually focuses on areas of the body where attention is commonly felt, such as the head, shoulders and chest area.
It's a way to exercise the power of the mind over the body. Number four visualization visual ization is the use of mental imagery to induce relaxation. Some visualization exercises involve picturing a place of serenity and comfort such as a beach or a garden. Other visualization exercises involve imagining the release of anger in a metaphorical form. An example of this latter kind of visualization is imagining one's anger as a ball to be released to space. Number five music some people find listening to music as very relaxing.
The kind of music that's coming differs from person to person. Traditional relaxation music includes classical pieces, acoustic sounds, and even ambient noises. Number six arts and crafts. There are people who find working with their hands is a good way to relax. This is especially true for people who feel their attentions and their hands. drawing pictures, paper construction and sculpting are just some of the ways to de stress when faced with an anger trigger.
Arts and crafts are helpful because it keeps a person from obsessing on the anger while he or she is still in the recovery phase of the anger cycle. blowing off some steam. Another way of controlling your anger is by getting the anger energy out blowing off steam. These techniques are especially helpful when you were in the crisis phase of the anger cycle. The following are some constructive ways of blowing off steam. Number one screaming if the place would allow it screaming can help release the tensions and frustrations that come with anger.
Think of the thing that angers you the most build momentum and let it out in one big shout. You may also scream out the words you wish you could say if the venue is appropriate, the louder The Scream the better. Number two physical activity. Many people find exercise, sports, dancing and even just pacing about as effective ways to vent anger. This makes sense. If the fight and flight response gears a person for physical action than physical action might indeed be the best way to deal with the anger.
Physical activity is also believed to release endorphins, our natural mood regulators. Number three pillow punching. The need to fight back may be channeled through punching pillows. Pillows provide a safe way to release tensions. It's safe not just for the object of the anger but also for oneself. Related techniques include wringing out towels and breaking old plates.
Number four writing physical activities are not your thing. You can blow off steam by expressing your thoughts and feelings in writing. You can write in an unstructured way simply putting on paper The first thing that comes to your mind. You can also be more creative about it and channel your anger through poetry or song. Number five singing here's a new one. vent your anger by going to your nearest video gate or a karaoke bar.
Many people find singing therapeutic, especially if the song lyrics and melody matches one's mood.