So we've reached the end of this course in handling conflict at work. I want to wish you well, I want to wish you good luck. I want to wish you good fortune in handling conflict effectively and harnessing it creatively. And I also want to leave you with one last thought, which is everything I know about how to really avoid conflict, because conflict comes from a breakdown in respect. While you respect the other person, you can negotiate with them. When you stop respecting them in for a moment, conflict breaks out conflict is an escalation of emotion.

So the way to avoid conflict is to remain calm is to remain respectful, is to remain mindful. And I remember early in my career and you may have had a similar experience. I turned up late at a hotel that had been booked for me. It was a work trip. I'd had a home day's work and I've been driving for a couple of hours. It was late.

I was tired ahem had any food. Guess what? receptionist told me there wasn't a room booked in my name. I didn't have a room looked at with calm rationality from now I had a choice in how I dealt with the situation. But I wasn't calm. I wasn't rational.

And I managed to get into conflict with the one person who was present that could actually help me get a room was stupid was that. If on the other hand, I remain mindful and calm and could have negotiated, I could have discussed I could have appealed for help. It's very rare that a hotel can't find somewhere to put you up. Maybe in a sister Hotel 10 miles down the road, but at least you get a bed for the night. But if you want to avoid conflict, you need to avoid escalating your temper. And that's about self control.

So there really is my sequence of conflict handling is all in self control, self control will preempt conflict, self control, will slow the escalation and reverse it. self control is necessary. If you're going to turn conflict around, if conflict has got the better of you. It's self control that will enable you to face the other person with whom your relationship is broken down. Say I recognize this relationship is broken down. I want to fix it.

So self control is the ultimate secret. Stay calm yourself calm. flicked the clock.