Lesson number two, we're going to build your strong circle. Now we're going to talk about your relationships. And we're going to talk about relationships in their fullest capacity, not just one relationship in particular, talking about relationships with family, with friends with mentors, and others. And we're going to be referencing a couple chapters from the be solid book. Remember, you have a digital copy, I hope you're reading along. Maybe you've read it cover to cover already, if you haven't, here are the chapters that we're going to be referencing, In this lesson, chapter five, chapter seven, Chapter 11, Chapter 15, and chapter 25. your friends and your support system in the healing journey are so essential.

Do you currently have a strong support system for yourself? If so, awesome. You're gonna learn some more valuable tools to increase the potential excellence of your existing support system, but we're also going to learn some new things that maybe will help you reshape the way way you feel about your support system. What makes these people so valuable to you? If you haven't carefully selected the individuals whom you are seeking advice from, who you are spending time with, who are you are sharing your story with, and being vulnerable with, you're going to be making some changes after this lesson. Because the quality of the people you surround yourself with is of utmost importance.

Remember what we learned in the first lesson. kindness to self is the backbone of healing and recovery. If you don't have healthy and hold people around you, and supporting you in the healing process, you are not being kind to yourself. There are certain characteristics that healthy and humble people have that toxic people don't. You're going to learn that in this lesson. Now, here's something I'm not going to do.

I am not going to tell you specific people that you know, because I don't know specific people that you know, I'm not going to tell you that you shouldn't hang out with charlo or that you shouldn't spend time with Dan Or that Bob is just a terrible influence on you. I'm not going to do that to you because I don't know any of these people. But I am going to talk to you about healthy characteristics and healthy attributes of good whole solid people because those are the people that you want in your life. This small group of people that we're going to build around you for your support system, we're going to call your strong circle. And for the rest of this lesson, we will look at what your strong circle support system is, how to build the best one for you, what characteristics to look for in the right people to support your healing and your personal growth.

And you will be given the opportunity to talk with the right people to help you in this process. All right, let's look at the components of your strong circle. Your strong circle are the two to five people who give you the most help healing encouragement and restoration now that also can include some advice and some counsel if that's the direction you want to go in and those people you want to bring into your strong circle. Here's the thing, we don't do anything alone. And that's why being selective and careful about who you surround yourself with, is so important. And why we begin this whole course and experience in the wholeness journey.

And what I talked about in the be solid method with kindness. Who do you want in your support system? Now, I'm not asking for specific people, in terms of specific names of people that you know, I want you to look at this from a character quality standpoint. And so much of the lessons that you're going to learn so much of the teaching I have for you here is about looking at character quality. It makes all the difference in the world. Here's some character qualities for you to key in on.

You want responsible people close to you, people who make good and wise decisions. We'll talk about decision making in a later lesson because that is also very important. You want people who are loving, who are supportive and who are kind. You want people who are optimistic and see the light In things, people who bring out good and the best and others, people who see the best in other people, who do you not want. I'll give you some examples of those people. You don't want pessimists or complainer's or constant partiers who spend all of their free time, drunken, stoned, and in some other lala land not operating out of their wholeness, because those aren't the most healthy people to be around and to surround yourself with, especially when you're healing from heartbreak.

Be aware of other people's patterns of behavior, who you surround yourself with is who you are choosing to attract into your life. Think about that for a second. Who you surround yourself with is who you are attracting and who you are, you are choosing to attract into your life. Your relationships influence your behavior, the influence your beliefs and your decision making because we are the median. We are the middle of the five people We spend the most time with. Now this is true in your emotional well being, your outlook on life, your inner peace, your finances, your spirituality and your physical health.

Again, we are all influenced by who and what we bring into our lives. What characteristics make the best people for your strong circle? We've discussed this a little bit earlier, but you want people who give healthy and great advice because they're wise and knowledgeable, if they have experience in overcoming hardship or heartbreak, that's very powerful and helpful to trust as a key factor here. Remember, the safe space is also the people that you're with. If you hang out with people who like to gossip, people who operate on the latest rumors, they want to know the little tidbits and all the saucy stuff that's going on, so they can go to the rumor mill and tell everybody about it. These aren't people that are gonna help you in your healing journey.

You want people who honor your privacy because your heart and your mind deserve that Remember, you are worth fighting for this strong circle support system or the close confidant that you lean on during your healing. These are the people to spend your time with. Because when you're not at work or taking care of your family, these are the people you want to influence you. And to surround you and support you. We become like the people that we hang out with. So getting healed and whole may mean that you reevaluate who you spend your time with.

And that by itself may ruffle the feathers of some of your friends who like to be irresponsible. If you have friends like that, or friends who like to sit around and complain and blame others for their problems. You need to surround yourself with people whom you want to influence you and you want to guide you into healing from your worst experience. To help you transform into the best version of you. Great athletes surround themselves with other great athletes so that they can grow and improve their game. great musicians surround themselves With other great musicians who are even better at their instrument than they are because they want to level up their game, great writers do the same thing.

It's about leveling up. So do this with your life and your relationships to heal and grow. Alright, we're going to do an exercise, we're going to create your strong circle. This decision to change your closest circle of friends and the people that you spend time with is just for you. It's for your healing, and it's for your restoration, because you are worth fighting for. So choose the best people for your healing.

Choose the people who provide the best attitude and environment for your peace and your well being. Do this exercise. Once you take your journal out, and we need to make a shortlist of people with the characteristic traits that I mentioned before. I want you to write down why they are healthy, whole people, why you want to be influenced by them and why you want them in your support system. And then I want you to To give them a call, or a text or an email or a message, get ahold of them in some form or fashion, and see if you can meet up with them and talk. When you see them.

Tell them a little bit about where you are in life and what you're going through in case they don't already know. Now, some of these people might be people that know your story already. And in that case, all you need to do is ask them if you can spend some more time with them because you want their powerful and loving influence in your life. You want to experience their peace and maybe you want to ask them for advice. Maybe you want their help in your healing process. You are building a strong circle.

That's what this is doing. And you're treating yourself with love and kindness and respect. Because you're surrounding yourself with love and kindness and respect. After you have a short list of two to five people and after you've messaged them to meet up, go have some great conversations. Go have some great life giving wonderful experiences with these people and Write that down in your journal who these people are and what conversations you have with them. Write about your experience.

Write about how you're building your strong circle. And maybe that even means asking them if you can set up a specific time, once a week or every couple of days to talk with them to check in with them to update them on where you are, and have that accountability. This is really important. Whatever it is that you agreed to do with the other person, write that down in your journal and commit to it with your whole heart. When you've done this, you'll be ready to move on to the next lesson.