If you have a fear of public speaking, relax, it just means you're normal. Most people have a fear of public speaking. In fact, numerous polls have shown that the number one fear people have is public speaking. So it's actually kind of weird if you don't fear, public speaking. As Jerry Seinfeld always points out, because of this poll, it means most people, if they had to go to a funeral would rather be in the casket than delivering the eulogy. Now, I think that is going too far.

I think most people if you said, Alright, you have to jump out of this plane without a parachute or jump off this cliff or give a short speech. Most people would be very happy to give that speech. I do think that giving a speech is one of those things that the average person can be asked to do in the course of a normal week is the thing that creates a lot of tension that makes them uncomfortable. So I do understand why people say they fear public speaking, but I've got a little test for you right now. If I said to you, you're going to go to a restaurant tonight, and see your three best friends. It's gonna be a noisy, crowded restaurant, there'll be a lot of people around.

And you're going to talk to your best friends about the game you all saw last night that you care about, or a particular movie also on the last week, and everyone's passionate about it, and now it's your turn to talk about what you thought of it. And you've got a glass of wine or whatever you enjoy. Now. Are you nervous? When you're talking? Chances are no.

Well, guess what? That's public speaking. You're in a room. There are a lot of people there and your mouth is moving. You're speaking as well. TJ that's different.

Relaxed, I'm with friends really isn't different. The reason you're comfortable is, you know how you're coming across. You're feeling relaxed, but that The fact that there's a room full of people and your mouth is moving in sound is coming. That's not actually making you nervous, but you are doing public speaking. Now, why do I point that out? It's because I believe most people who are nervous about public speaking, are nervous.

In a narrower context. They're nervous about speaking in public, in school or in business, where they're not quite sure how they're coming across. And they're not quite sure if the information they're presenting is interesting to anyone, or is understandable to anyone. If you're talking about the big game last night that you saw, and you saw it with your buddies or your friends, you know, they understand what you're talking about. There's that sense of commonality. And yet if you're giving a new business pitch, or if you're talking to an angel investor or a venture capitalist about why this person should fund your organization for a million dollars, you may be feeling really scared.

Nervous. But I want to suggest to you it's not really about public speaking. It's really more about this particular situation of Do I have an interesting message? Are they gonna like me? Those are separate issues, if you absolutely, positively can never speak in public if you go to a restaurant with your family members, and you can't talk at all because you're just so afraid of people around. I'm afraid this course isn't for you.

I'm not going to be able to help you. But if you're like most people, where you are comfortable in certain situations, but then deathly afraid, other situations, this course is really going to help you. Now let's take a step back. Why are we nervous? When we speak? evolutionary biologists believe that human beings are programmed to fear being separated from the crowd.

It's a defense mechanism in prehistoric days if you're a part of the herd, doesn't matter if you're Gazelle or deer. As human beings, if you're away from the herd, you're vulnerable some lion or Tiger bear can see just you zoom in on you, grab you, kill you and eat you. So when you're standing up to speak, the whole herd, you were with the audience, they're over there. You're now standing, you're the only person everyone can see. So from an evolutionary biological standpoint, it makes sense to be nervous. So your body is sending adrenaline throughout, everywhere in your veins and because of that, your brain is shutting down because your body is saying, Don't think, run.

And that's why if you've ever noticed, your palms might get wet. If you weren't wearing shoes, you would notice the bottoms of your feet are getting wet. That's because your body is preparing you for flight. Your body is preparing you to run away from what it senses is a dangerous situation. You being isolated from the crowd. Now the The good news is, even though some college campuses, the audience can be rude or heckled, it's highly unlikely that any audience member is going to come attack you physically attack you, and kill you and eat you.

It's just not likely to happen. So at some level, we've got to hide that from our own sense and not worry about it. And instead focus what we really got to do and that is, speak in a way that's interesting, and understandable and relevant to your audience. The number one way to get over, being afraid of speaking, is you got to focus exclusively on your audience, helping them if you're really focused on helping your audience understand something, learn something. You don't even have the luxury of thinking about yourself at that point, your nerves will melt away.