Listening Types

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Transcript

I want to go into some listenings. in more detail I've talked about you always speak into a listening. And I can give you some flavors of this so that you can start to understand how and why the listenings differ. Let's dip into the field of neuro linguistic programming for a moment NLP, there's some quite interesting stuff in there. I mean, I've studied it because I love communication. And this is one piece I think it is worth having a look at.

NLP people would say that each of us has a primary what they call a modality, a way of perceiving the world, whether it's visual, auditory, or kinesthetic, or physical. Some people are primarily visual, and if you're a visual person, you would tend to be using the phrases or doing the things in that first column. So If you're looking to get somewhere, you'd be looking at a map or you tend to say things like, I see what you mean. Or watch how I do it. And you tend to write things down a lot more. Your leisure tends to be around looking at things, auditory people, and that would definitely include me would tend to want to engage with the IRS, ask for directions, call people up rather than write to them.

I greatly prefer talking to people to writing to people texting, for example. They tend to say things like, Oh, that sounds good, or how does that sound? As opposed to how does that look? and so forth. And now you're getting the picture. kinesthetic, physical people tend to talk about feelings, Oh, that feels good, or I know how you feel or let me have a go and they tend to want to do things physically do things as opposed to understand things in other ways.

So which are you? I wonder what's your primary modality. It's interesting to reflect on that. And of course, if you're talking to a group of people, then it's quite important to give each of them what they need. So you might want to move between Do you see? or How does that sound?

Or how does that feel to you, so that you're including everybody. You can't possibly know which modalities are out there. So if you move between them comfortably, then you're making sure everybody is receiving nicely. It's good to know yours, though. Because that will tend to color the language you use. And if you're very, very auditory, like me, it's quite important also, to make allowances for that and to deliberately use language that perhaps isn't natural to you, in order to be better understood.

So I will say to people, do you see what I mean? Whereas it's much more natural for me to say, how does that sound okay, And listening personalities. There are many, many, many listening personalities out there. Now, again, you can't possibly define for a group of people what the listening personality is, which is why I say simply ask yourself, what's the listening? What's the listening and you'll pick it up. Intuitively, you can, however, look at your own listening personality, and define it and think about how you are listening to other people.

And it may be that you've got friends or people you talk to a great deal at work, who have a particular listening personality. So which of these kinds of people would you speak to the most and which are you? Are you helpful? kind in your listening? Are you a bit absent minded, quiet in your listening, there are lots of different options here and it is useful to consider these and to understand that you can speak into so many different listenings. Now, another way of dividing people up is the way that psychometric testing Has and I'll give you a couple of examples of this.

This is a test I did many many years ago. And it still exists and is still very popular the DI SC work, which I did when I was getting a job as a salesperson. It divides people into four kind of camps. Everybody is a may launch of these four. It's very rare to get anybody who's completely purely one but there tends to be a leading category, something that you're more naturally aligned with. So dominant people tend to be quite overbearing sometimes perhaps they're blunt, they're they just want the big picture.

They get straight to the point no messing about influential people. A lot of salespeople in this category, optimistic enthusiastic like collaborating, but they don't like being ignored at all. Steady people. Like to get on with things in a calm way. They would probably read the manual from page one to page two Hundred before they open the box, and conscientious people, they love objective, they want the details of the process and they don't like being wrong at all. Now most of us are a mixture of all four.

And again, it's quite useful to understand in which ways you tend to be emphasizing those characteristics. And, again, be able if you're if you're more conscious of your own proclivities, it's much easier to change as you need to to get your message across to an audience because it's all about getting the ball over the net to the people on the other side. It's not about you. It's about delivering so that you're understood. Here's another very, very popular psychometric profile, the Myers Briggs test, many of you may have done this in jobs. And again, I won't go into this in huge detail.

They divide the world into 16 different groups of people. It is quite a powerful system if you do it intensively, and you fill out the full questionnaire, then you'll find that the description they come up with about you is quite frightening Lee accurate in many ways. So you've got the extrovert introvert axis, you've got the sense versus intuition axis, you've got thinking feeling and you've got judging against perceiving. And when you put those things together, you get the 16 boxes. Again, this is really here to show you. There are so many different types of people out there and it's such a mistake to assume that everybody listens like I do.

And here's another one. Two more to show you. format. Dr. Bernice McCarthy created this for the classroom really it was about learning preferences. So she after her years of experience isolated that people tend to want to learn in slightly different ways. Some people are more feeling some people are more thinking.

There's that Again, some people are more into action, some people are more into reflection. And you get this Why what? How if divide between people, here is the way that the the why, what, how and what if tend to break down into different characteristics of the groups. So which one are you, a theorist and activist, a pragmatist, or a reflector? Again, we will probably most of us have all four of these in us somewhere, but there's probably something that's dominant. And that would tend to dictate the way that you like to learn.

Great to understand about yourself, because it can really help you to engage with the right sort of learnings and the right sort of teachings. Also, very important to ask this question about your audience and to understand that any group of people probably includes all these four types and it's important therefore, to go through through the different ways of teaching, and to mix them up a bit so that you're not focused just on one type of your audience. And the final distinction that I'll give you is think feel know, which comes from management consultancy. The think people tend to be rational and they just want the details and the numbers. The field people are the more creative and motive and they're into relationships and connections. And the know people.

It's about gut instinct, it's about intuition, and the big picture. So if you were going to talk about the weather forecast for tomorrow, this is the way you would probably want to put it across to those three different types of people. The think people very fact based people, they want to know the facts. So the chance of rain tomorrow is 55% and 12 degrees there. You've got all the facts in there you go thank you very much the field people want to know how's it going to feel chilly. might get wet.

The know people, they just want the summary. What do I do? Take a burly jumper and jacket. That's enough. Don't need to know the details just need to know what do i do and I'm on the case. So what are the listenings that you mainly speak into?

And please, please, please just get into that habit of asking yourself what's the listening before every talk? This is the crucial part of content. If you get good at this, you'll get good at developing content. Whatever systems you use, you'll get good at delivering exactly the right message to the right people.

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